


Gnomecoming

by Malkontent



Category: Dungeons & Dragons (Roleplaying Game)
Genre: Action, Action/Adventure, Banter, Campfires, F/M, Fantasy, Fantasy Sex, Gnomes, Height Differences, Humans, Interracial By Fantasy Standards, Magic, Size Difference, Swords & Sorcery, Tropes, Vaginal Fingering, Vaginal Sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-16
Updated: 2017-12-16
Packaged: 2019-02-15 12:23:13
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,820
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13031046
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Malkontent/pseuds/Malkontent
Summary: A wizard and a fighter on a boring trade escort mission get more than they bargained for and find more than they expected.





	Gnomecoming

**Author's Note:**

  * For [magisterequitum](https://archiveofourown.org/users/magisterequitum/gifts).



> Merry Yuletide! I really hope that you enjoy this little story. I admit I had to go through some of your stories and your previous years' letters for inspiration :) Happy holidays!
> 
> P.S. I'm so sorry about the title. I just had to.

The wagon trundled along the dirt road, creaking slightly under the weight of its cargo. At the reins was a large human man, his chainmaille armor glinting in the sunlight and his mouth drawn into a bored, tired expression.

Amid the boxes and crates that lined the inside of the covered wagon, a flame-haired gnomish woman lay sprawled on an oversized bedroll. Her black and red robes were cinched about her waist with a leather belt. Nearby was an old, leather-bound tome on the nature of planar condensation and inter-dimensional conjuration. For the moment it lay opened but ignored.

Abryssa was exhausted, but more out of boredom than any expenditure of energy. She had just finished her morning shift at driving the cart and she was bone-weary with the tedium of the journey.

Not that she wanted any surprises either, of course. The merchant who had hired them to convey the goods-laden wagon had assured them it was going to be an easy run. It was a less-used road, to be sure, but there hadn’t been any signs of bandits or monsters in these woods for months now. And it wasn’t like they were even hauling anything very valuable. Just some crates of knick knacks and old junk bound for a second hand adventuring gear store in the marketplace at Uchkara.

But Abryssa couldn’t shake the feeling that there was something wrong. She was no augur, her particular specialty being evocation and conjuration, but years of working the adventuring circuit throughout the four kingdoms had given her good instincts. Right now her instincts told her that this was a four-person job, not the easy two-person escort their patron had made it out to be.

Damn, cheap merchants.

There was a sharp tearing sound; Abryssa looked up in surprise, startled out of her reverie. Bright sunlight streamed in through two small, ragged holes in the wagon’s canvas roof, one on each side. It was a beautiful autumn day, and through the holes she could just see the tops of the trees rustling in the slight breeze.

Funny. Those holes hadn’t been there before.

Suddenly something in her mind clicked into place.

“Arrows!” she screamed, reaching over to grab a polished maplewood staff that was propped against a nearby box.

Only a moment later Gierhardt called out from the driver’s seat.

“Ambush!”

Three more arrows zipped through the canvas in quick succession and Abryssa hopped to her feet, keeping herself low. Luckily the ambushers were firing at human head level, which was nearly a meter above her. It wasn’t the first time in her career that being short had come in handy.

The horses whinnied in confusion and she felt the cart lurch to a halt just as she was leaping for the canvas door. She stumbled and fell out of the cart gracelessly, landing on her side. Her elbow slammed painfully into the dirt wagon path, jarring her grip and sending the staff flying. More arrows skittered off the dirt and rocks around her.

“Havo qalqoni!” she shouted, throwing her hand up in a complicated gesture. The air in front of her shimmered and the arrows began to smack into the haze and bounce off of it harmlessly. Abryssa scrambled to her feet and looked around, sizing up the situation from behind her magical shield.

The arrows were coming from behind the shadowy treeline, but Abryssa could see four hooded humanoid figures emerging from it with short swords. They wore long brown cloaks and leather armor over dark clothes and they appeared to be human, although she couldn’t quite tell beneath their hoods. From the volume of arrows Abryssa guessed there were at least three archers covering them from the trees.

Gierhardt had already leapt from the wagon and was charging two of the swordsmen, his longsword and bronze shield glimmering in the midday light. She knew he could handle his own.

The other two, one male and one female, were headed towards Abryssa. As the first one closed he lunged at her with his sword. She swung the magic shield around quickly to get it between her and the blade, but in doing so she was forced backward. He pressed her back, raising his sword for a downward swing.

Humans. They were so predictable. They always assumed that the same tactics that worked on someone their height would work on someone half their size.

Abryssa brought her shield up above her head, deflecting the downward blow, and then quickly threw herself forward, rolling between her attacker’s legs. She was no rogue, and her landing was rough, but she managed to get up onto her knees before her attacker could react to what had happened.

“Kislota!” she shouted, pointing her hand up at his back. Fuming acid sprayed from her hand towards him, covering his back and quickly eating through his cloak to the armor beneath.

Her assailant bent over, crying out and clawing at his back, trying to pull off the dissolving armor. He managed to get it over his head and turned to face his tiny enemy. His face was contorted with rage.

“Sehrli o'q!” Abryssa said with a grin, as two arrows of shimmering force flew from her fingers, striking the armorless bandit with crackling thuds. The man’s eyes rolled back in his head and he slumped to the ground, dead.

One down. Now… where did the other one get to?

Abryssa looked around and saw the female bandit hopping down out of the back of the carriage, clutching a leather tube in her hand.

“Hey!” Abryssa shouted, “Get back here!” The woman paid her no heed and bolted for the treeline.

“Ooooooh, no you don’t…” Abryssa muttered as she reached into her robes and pulled out a small, fluid filled pouch. She hurled the bag at the fleeing woman and it landed squarely at her feet.

The tanglefoot bag burst open, splattering the ground and the thief with a viscous brown liquid. The woman’s foot stuck fast to the ground and she tripped, landing on her back in the gooey puddle. Everything the liquid touched became stuck fast and within moments the thief was paralyzed, glued to the road and unable to do more than squirm around ineffectually.

Abryssa laughed, “What’s the rush? You should stick around a while!”

Her smile faded. That was terrible. She was going to have to put some more work into her quips.

Abryssa’s celebration was cut short by another volley of arrows that sent her scurrying for cover. Looking around desperately, she spotted her staff lying on the ground a few meters away. She dove for it, landing hard on her side. With a twist of her body she pointed the dark wooden stick at the treeline and shouted the staff’s command words.

“Do'zaxda yoqish!”

The treeline exploded in a wave of fire and Abryssa heard a chorus of screams. A few moments later the arrows stopped clattering around her and the battle was over.

“Gods damnit!” Abryssa cried, pulling herself to her feet with the help of her staff. Her robes were torn in several places and her elbow was going to hurt in the morning, but as far as she could tell she was uninjured.

She dusted herself off and then tromped indignantly over to the prone thief. She put one tiny foot on her chest and smiled down at her.

“Well, you’ve got guts, I’ll give you that much…”

As a reply, the woman merely spat up at her, and Abryssa ducked to avoid it.

“Fine, be that way. Sore loser.”

Abryssa reached down and grabbed the small leather tube from where it had fallen next to the thief. She ran a hand through her spiky red hair in exhaustion and then cocked her head. Over the quiet crackle of the still-smoldering trees she could hear a moaning coming from the other side of the wagon.

“Shit! Gierhardt!” She had been so preoccupied with her own battle she hadn’t seen what had happened to the fighter.

She pushed off on the woman’s chest with her foot, causing her to grunt in pain, and raced around to the opposite side of the cart.

“Hang on, baby! I’m coming!” She yelled.

Gierhardt lay on the ground in a spreading pool of crimson. He was currently trying to pull himself up to a sitting position with his sword while his left hand gripped his side, the apparent source of the blood loss. Nearby him on the ground lay the two dead bodies of his attackers, one of them in two distinct pieces.

“Is it bad?” Abryssa asked, kneeling beside him. Her thin eyebrows were furrowed with worry.

“No, it’s fine. I’ll just walk it off.” he replied through gritted teeth.

“Damnit, I knew we should have had a cleric with us…” she said, hurriedly examining his wound.

“How many healing potions do we have?” Gierhardt asked.

Abryssa felt around inside her robes, checking the many small pockets and pouches that were sewn into the lining.

“Ummmm…” she said sheepishly, pulling out a small red vial.

“One?”

Gierhardt rolled his eyes and groaned.

“I was going to stock up in Uchkara when we got paid!” Abryssa protested, “This was supposed to be an easy run!”

Gierhardt grimaced and took the vial from the gnome.

“It’s ok. All that blood was weighing me down anyway.”

He swigged the red liquid and winced as the skin on his side started knitting itself together. It would stop the bleeding and get him on his feet, but he would probably need a few days to get back to full strength.

Abryssa sighed and put a hand on his armored chest.

“Damnit, you scared the nine hells out of me…” she muttered, “Are you going to be ok?”

Gierhardt smiled and put his gloved hand over hers, engulfing it completely.

“I’ll be fine. Did any of them get away? Did they take anything?”

Abryssa shook her head.

“No. We dropped all of them except…”

Her eyes opened wide.

“Shit...”

She hopped up and ran back around the side of the wagon, leaving a confused Gierhardt to pull himself slowly to his feet. When she rounded the wagon she saw the puddle of brown goo where the thief had been, but the only traces of her were her cloak and a few random bits of armor which she had shed to escape.

“Shit!”

  
\----------------------

  
“I’m telling you, they knew exactly what they were looking for. They didn’t even try to steal anything else and somehow they knew just where to find that thing.”

“I’m not disagreeing with you,” Gierhardt said with a sigh. He held up the leather scroll case and the parchment that it had contained, “But who goes to that kind of trouble for a blank piece of paper? They must have confused us for someone else or something.”

They had pulled the wagon off the road into a clearing in the woods and set up camp. Luckily the horses hadn’t spooked and the cart itself was undamaged except for a few arrow holes.

Gierhardt had taken off his armor and shirt to wash his wound and clean up from the battle, and he now lay near the fire, his back against a large oak tree. Abryssa sat nearby on her bedroll, pouting. The sun was setting behind the trees and in a few hours the nighttime chill would set in, but for now it was pleasantly cool in the last rays of sunset.

“And you’re not at all worried that there’s a pissed off, half naked bandit woman out there who’s probably looking for us?”

Gierhardt grinned.

“Half naked, you say? Maybe we should go look for her after all.”

Abryssa crossed her arms and huffed.

“Really? That’s what you’re thinking about right now?”

Gierhardt laughed. He set the parchment and leather case down near the fire and waved for her to come closer.

“You worry too much, little bug.”

Abryssa smirked and shuffled over on her knees.

“You don’t worry enough, you big oaf,” she said, positioning herself on his lap, her legs straddling his hips.

The fighter pushed her robes up her legs, running his calloused fingers gently over the pale skin of her thighs. She shivered, partly from his touch and partly from the cool night air on her legs.

She leaned forward and pressed her palms against his chest. His muscles shifted beneath her fingers as his hands moved further up to her hips beneath her robes. She looked up into his eyes with mock effrontery.

“Oh, so now thoughts of half naked thieves aren’t enough for you, eh?”

“Never when you’re around…” Gierhardt replied with a grin that he knew full well would melt her more readily than any fireball or acid arrow.

Abryssa sighed happily and shifted her weight so she could move more freely. Her hands roamed over the taut flesh of his chest and arms, careful to avoid the fresh wound on his side.

“You are such a ham.”

“I mean it,” the human replied seriously, “You’re beautiful, smart, capable. Why would I ever need anyone else?”

Abryssa’s cheeks blushed almost as red as her hair.

“Flattery will get you laid,” she said with a smirk, “But if that’s true, why haven’t you asked me to marry you yet? We’ve been doing this for five years now.”

“Just a few more decent paying jobs and we’ll have enough to retire somewhere,” Gierhardt said, “Maybe buy a farm outside of Turakurgon.”

Abryssa laughed.

“Do you really picture me as a farm girl?”

Gierhardt chuckled.

“Don’t worry, I’ll pull the plow. You could work at the Arcane University. You always wanted to teach.”

His hands had found their way between her legs and were beginning to caress her in very agreeable ways.

“Mmmm… that feels good…” she purred, “And it sounds good too. Assuming of course that we survive that long.”

Gierhardt chose not to respond verbally, but instead pulled her to him, pressing his lips against hers. Their tongues mingled as they caressed each other, Abryssa’s hips beginning to move in time with her lover’s fingers. She moaned into his mouth.

They broke the kiss only long enough for Abryssa to slip her heavy robes over her head and toss them aside. She was significantly lighter without them, stuffed as the pockets were with spell components, potions, and other odds and ends.

Gierhardt reached up with one hand and cupped one of the gnome’s small breasts, moving a thumb slowly around her pink nipple. Abryssa reached down and undid the ties of his trousers, and soon he was inside her. They clung to each other fiercely as Abryssa moved back and forth against him until waves of pleasure engulfed them both.

When they had finished, Abryssa nuzzled up against his chest, her fingers idly tracing lines on his skin. She wanted to stay just like that forever, wrapped in his warmth, and never have to go back to dealing with merchants and bandits and idiotic missions like this one. Her skin tingled all over wherever he was touching her, and as far as she was concerned the rest of the world could fuck off for a while.

“What is that?” Gierhardt asked casually.

“What?” she murmured, not even deigning to open her eyes.

She felt his weight shift beneath her and she sighed, peeking with one eye as he reached over to grab the sheet of parchment which had been left near the roaring campfire. When he held it up she could see that there were now dark squiggles and lines on one corner of it.

Suddenly he had her full attention. She hopped off of him and grabbed the parchment, holding it up to the light.

“What the fuck…” she muttered, “The text is in Draconic, but it must be written with infernal ink. It only reveals itself when near a fire.”

Completely unconcerned about her nudity, the gnome knelt next to the ring of stones that held the campfire and carefully held the map closer to the flames. Within moments more dark lines began appearing, covering the surface of the sheet.

“Holy…” her eyes opened wide.

“What?” Gierhardt asked excitedly, looking over her shoulder, “What is it? Can you read it?”

She held the paper up for him to see.

“Gierhardt, this is a map to a dragon’s hoard…”

Gierhardt whistled in astonishment.

“I guess that explains why that thief wanted it so bad… ”

Abryssa nodded.

“And you better believe she’ll be back for it. If this text is right, there’s a fortune up for grabs here. And that cheap asshole that hired us probably never even knew what he had.”

Gierhardt leaned back and scratched his chin.

“Are you thinking what I’m thinking, little bug?” he asked with a sly grin.

Abryssa shot her own grin right back at him.

“I think I hear adventure calling.”

 

 

 


End file.
